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May 26, 2014

Another month (of trying to breathe for air)

I've successfully made it through to another month of my life. I know it's not usual to hear someone say that, but, how else do I explain my raw emotion?

I'm alive. Though I may be Sedated, I'm able to talk through my subconscious and remain cogent.  That's one of the many things that you don't get to experience when you drink or take anti-depressants. I feel like I can understand and make rational decisions based upon the situation and it's circumstances where as when I am taking a Klonopin, I feel more like all my emotions are sedated..

I've begun to understand that being an adult now means that I should view my life more like an adult. I am not a child anymore, and I should learn to handle things that have me depressed. I should turnkey-change it, and start fixing things where I'm messing up at.

All of this is going to take a long time, but it will eventually work out or so I hope.

My only dreading feeling is the monkey on my back talking about my license not being returned. Let's hope I get it back on the day of court, I could use some transport.

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