And so, there it was, that dead feeling inside of me. I constantly wondered if I'd messed things up so bad that it wasn't repairable. Messed up so bad that I couldn't get it all back. The love feelings, the mutual feelings, the want to be near me.. I had a gaping hole in my life where my heart used to be, and maybe I was the only one who hadn't moved on.. Maybe that's what I needed to do.. I didn't know anymore..